Parodies and Spoofs Fanfiction: Deadliest Warrior, Season X - 3. Invader Zim Vs Gordon Freeman
AN: The Next two match ups will be Gordon Freeman, the Main character of the Half-Life Series, along with Invader Zim of the series of the same name. Enjoy.
An Irken invader who will stop at nothing to achieve his twisted goals.
A scientist whose skill in battle and combat has saved him time and time again.
Who is deadliest?
Bren turned to the camera smiling
“Gordon Freeman is a scientist from Black Mesa and he had to deal with aliens, big ones, small ones, easy to see that he is going to take out Zim” Bren said
“Zim had the tech to take on anyone, enough said” Rommel said to the camera while standing next to all of the weapons and tools.
The Laser Pistol
While Gordon will be bringing
“All these weapons are the most unusual I’ve seen so far, and I think this might be a good match up” Bren said
For the first test they decided to test out the two fired weapons. Zim with his laser pistol and Gordon with his Crossbow.
It shows a clip of Zim firing a few laser shots at a gel torso, and they could see small holes that would cause some serious damage
But then when Gordon fired one shot from his crossbow, he fired one shot at the gel torso and it went flying back into the back wall behind it impaling it to the stone.
“Ok that is serious damage, the crossbow is powerful but its one shot and reload while Zim can fire off more shots, so I’m gonna have to give it to the blaster but barely” Bren said
For the next test they decided to test personal tools, Gordon’s crowbar against Zim’s PAK.
It rolls the clip of the testing
Zim’s PAK, the backpack like device on his back sprung out four walker arms
“This device has many functions and uses, it lets me run faster, climb walls, and all sorts of other cool things that filthy Earth humans can’t do” Zim said proudly
Gordon then used his crowbar to beat the head open of a gel dummy, in two swings, the head was cracked open
“Zim’s pack is good, I will agree, but it’s a tool, and not really lethal, the crowbar may not be much of a tool but it can kill, so the edge goes to the crowbar” Rommel said.
For the next test they tested other weapons, Zim’s Harvester, against Gordon’s grenades.
It shows a clip of Gordon throwing a red grenade at a group of dummies, and in a small fiery explosion, they were badly burned
It then shown Zim using the Harvester to take the brain of a cow, and replace it with a can of beans. The cow began to twitch and roll around a bit like it insane.
Both Bren and Rommel felt a bit uncomfortable from that.
“The Harvester is a pretty good weapon, but useless if it is used in the middle of a fight, it is one shot, and only for stealth. The Grenade on the other hand is fire, explosives, and portable, edge has to go to it.” Bren said
Finally they tested the last special weapons, The Gravity Gun, Vs GIR
It shows Gordon picking up a crate with the gravity gun and flinging it into the air, it fell to the ground with and crash and Bren and Rommel clapped a bit.
It was then Zim’s turn and he called for GIR
“GIR reporting for duty sir” The robot said in a serious tone
“What does the G stand for?” Bren asked
“I don’t know” GIR said in a stupid tone
“GIR attack the human gel dummy” Zim commanded and GIR’s eyes went red and he jumped at the dummy and did a few punches and kicks and took it out. It then saluted but then saw a nearby dog and ran to it going “Weeeeee!”
“GIR is a wild card, sometimes he is good, other times he is useless. The Gravity Gun can be used no hassle, the only problem is if there isn’t anything to throw. But the edge has to go to the gravity gun” Rommel said.
“Who do I think will win? Zim, he has the tech, he has the brains, he is an invader you know” Rommel said
“Gordon, he survived alien invasions, saved the world, and beat up countless head crabs, no contest” Bren said
Now Bren will impute all the data into a state of the art simulation program. And to make sure the battle isn’t won by a lucky blow, Bren will simulate the battle 1000 times to declare a winner.
Who will win?
It shows Zim flying in his spaceship towards Earth
Vs Black Mesa Scientist
It shows Gordon walking through the halls of the laboratory in his HEV Suit
It shows Gordon holding his iconic crowbar and facing off against five head crabs, all slowly crawling to him
Vs Alien Technology
It shows Zim in his underground room typing on his computer preparing for his latest scheme
Hero to the people
It Shows Gordon fighting along side resistance soldiers against combine forces
Vs Hated Alien
It shows Zim at “Skool” being hit with a lot of dodge balls by other kids
“Lets start this up” Bren said hitting a key on his laptop starting the simulation.
The simulation opens up to Gordon Freeman in his HEV suit walking around an old underground lab. In his hand is the Gravity gun.
Unknown to him, he was followed in the large air ducts by Zim who was quietly preparing to attack.
Gordon came to a stop to looking around and Zim opened up the air duct and slowly lowered himself down using the PAK arms, he had the harvester out and was about to take Gordon’s brain when Gordon felt something and he looked up and moved to the side to avoid losing his brain.
Zim glared at Gordon, it was a filthy human and Gordon stared at Zim, a hostile alien.
Zim pulled out his laser pistol and fired a few shots and Gordon who quickly dodged a few shots and Gordon used the Gravity gun to pull the pistol away from Zim.
Zim knowing he can’t win in a fair fight ran around the hallway using the PAK’s robotic legs. Gordon quickly followed in hot pursuit, dropping the gun onto the ground.
Zim turned a corner and found himself in a dead end hallway, and with no air duct he was trapped
Gordon pulled out his crossbow and fired a shot at Zim who barely had time to dodged, the arrow just a few centimeters from his head. He used two of the arms to try and stab Gordon but Gordon had dropped his crossbow and grab the two arms. He could barely hold on and Zim smiled.
“GIR come and finish this filthy Earth human” Zim called out
The small robot came around the corner with red eyes and was about to attack Gordon but he then noticed a fly buzzing around
“Hey a fly” GIR said and he proceeded to follow the fly
“GIR pay attention!” Zim demanded but the robot refused to listen and Gordon took the moment to twist the arms to the right allowing him move away. He ran back around the corner and pulled out a grenade and pulled the pin.
Zim followed close behind him but then saw the grenade fly out at him from behind Gordon
“This is gonna hurt” Zim said and he was engulfed in a small explosion
Gordon turned around to see if he took out the alien but he saw Zim still alive, a bit burned but alive
“Your going to have to do better then that filthy human” Zim said and he jumped at Gordon with the PAK arms set to impale him but Gordon moved out of the way but not before his left shoulder got pierced by one of the arms.
“Too bad human, you were a bit of fun to fight, but now it ends” Zim said ready to send the final blow but Gordon had pulled from his side, with his right hand, his crowbar, he swung it and broke off the piercing arm from his shoulder and Zim looked at him a bit worried, but he shook the feeling and then both glared at each other.
Gordon ran at Zim and swung the crowbar breaking the other front arm leaving Zim with only the other two to support him.
Gordon smirked a bit and Zim slowly backed up a bit but Gordon had already ran at him and broke the other two arms.
“Wait please don’t hurt me I didn’t mean all what I said about you filthy humans” Zim said trying to get the man to spare him but Gordon had then swung down on Zim and cracked his skull.
“Out of 1000 battles, Gordon had won 729 times, against Zim’s 271 victories, Zim was totally outclassed” Bren said
Gravity Gun: 195
It was Gordon’s iconic weapon, the crowbar, that achieved so many kills while his crossbow achieved the least amount of kills.
Laser Pistol: 144
Zim’s only double triple digit kills were from the Laser pistol and GIR, while his harvester and PAK were rendered useless against Gordon too many times.
“Zim had good tech, but it was the fact that he wasn’t made for one on one combat, more for stealth, creating the plan for his armada to come help, and GIR having the moments of stupidity, just made him no match for Gordon Freeman” Bren said
“I guess Bren is right, Zim is good in the back, but on the front lines, he isn’t so tough” Rommel said sighing
It finally shows Gordon clutching his left shoulder and walking out of the hall, smiling from his victory.
AN: Sorry to Invader Zim Fans, like I said before send in some match ups, or at least some stats of different character, maybe I can use them in some other match ups.